There are many men out there who have only one goal in mind – to find a woman who will complete them.
Of course, most of them aren’t looking for “Miss Right” with this exact thought.
But subconsciously, this is exactly what’s happening. They want to get a girl just to feel better about themselves, to fill the void in their lives. Otherwise, they will be miserable!
This is also where the problem arises this article is talking about: when you are looking for a girl just because you need to feel complete, normal or better about yourself, then you are doing it for all the wrong reasons.
Why You Don’t Need A Woman
The empty cup mentality is just wrong. You shouldn’t need a girl to feel complete!
If you really think that a woman on your side will make you a better person, your priorities in life are completely messed up.
You have to hammer this into your head: a woman won’t make you a different or better person. You will still be the same guy, with the same problems… but with a girlfriend!
Now, before you assume that I’m asking you to distance yourself from all women, then know that this is not what I meant when I wrote: “why you don’t need a woman.”
There is a huge difference between needing and wanting a girl. I have nothing against someone wanting to date girls, but when your priorities change from “wanting” to “needing”, then you have the problem discussed here.
The only person in the world, who can really change you; who can make a massive impact in your life, is you!
Sure, a woman on your side can give you the needed push to become a better person, but only when you want to do it!
But the fact is that men who assume that getting a girlfriend will start making them move mountains are mistaken. It is up to you to change your life!
The idea of completing each other is nice and all, but taking it too far can at times be dangerous.
Just imagine she dumps you.
Now you feel incomplete, you feel worthless without her in your life and start doubting in your self-image, your self-worth. Nothing seems as important as her and all you can think about is getting her back.
This way of thinking ruins lives and can take a very dark turn when guys decide that without a woman, life is not worth living.
You can’t allow yourself to hope that when you finally find a girlfriend, she will be the answer to your life. You are putting tremendous pressure on a girl in the hopes she will fix your problems.
You are asking her to fill a hole in your life she just can’t fill! This leads you to depend on her, and it’s a downward spiral what will eventually destroy the relationship.
Don’t get me wrong; I believe it’s possible that the completing each other mentality could work, but only if the couple has a healthy mindset to begin with.
Both would have to work on their own flaws first and not hope for the other person doing all the heavy lifting for them.
But if one of them brings more emotional baggage to the relationship than the other can handle, then the relationship will be doomed!
The Solution
The solution to a healthy relationship and a healthy lifestyle is to lose your empty cup mentality and accept that you have to work consistently on yourself and not look for someone else to do it for you.
Trust me, I have been there and experienced it myself.
Only when you learn to pull your own weight will you become satisfied with your life.
However one thing I have to tell you, should you take my advice, is this:
If you are working on solving your own problems and trying to become a better person, and a woman should come along, don’t write her off because you are not where you want to be!
It becomes counter-productive when you chase perfection with the goal in mind of getting girls but never try to hook up with them.
If you achieve your goals, you will always find something new to work on and you will never become complete (and that’s OK).
Many guys who work on themselves still are miserable because they chase perfection and it becomes an excuse for them not to act.
It’s the constant progression that you should strive for not the perfection/feeling complete and it’s also a thing women love in a man.
Like I said before, do not hope for a girl to fix you or complete you. Do it yourself and you will be happy. Because, if you are a happy person, the women you will meet and attract will be happy.
If this topic peaked your interest, then you have to take a look at The Girlfriend Activation System. It is a must watch course for every guy who wants to turn his life around and live the lifestyle of a fulfilled man.
It will also tell you exactly what you have to do to get a girlfriend and become the man she wants to keep.
Don Archer
Aug 20, 2018 at 11:54pmI come from the towing industry, working to help young men and women grow their businesses. One of the challenges these business owners must deal with is working for insurance companies. The problem is that the insurance companies pay extremely low rates for the services provided, barely enough for tow company owners to cover their costs. The reason the tow company owners go ahead and decide to work for the insurance companies anyway is that they're looking for a shortcut to success. But it's a trap, real success comes from taking the time to build relationships, learning your trade, and building a commanding online presence, so your business is visible when people need the services you provide. I liked what you said, shortcuts are the road most traveled, and that road is strewn with the crumbled dreams of many business owners. Thanks for the article.
ClydeBWene
Feb 16, 2016 at 11:15amI totally agree with you on this topic. I often try to look for shortcuts in the wrong places. Thank you for your informative post!